Executive Summary

A. Had some computer problems over the weekend. They're fixed now. It's totally not my fault, totally Windows XP. The most poorly documented problems I've ever encountered. But, yes, I'm TEH MAN so I crushed it.

B. Nothing to do at work anymore. Well, it was fun while it lasted. I'm bored to tears there. I just want something to do. Or a Gameboy. You know, whichever won't get me fired.

C. One reason why I wasn't hired at that job last year mid December like I would have liked? $500 bonuses were given out to all employees. Also, "causal Friday" is no longer. Nothing like things starting to go downhill starting with when you're hired.

D. When it comes out, I think I'll get an Xbox 360. I'm waiting for the ball to drop on the new secret model that's all hush hush: supposedly there's gonna be one with a 120 GB hard drive, HDMI output, and *possibly* HD-DVD built in. It will STILL be cheaper than a PS3.

E. I was ripped off on ebay. Never happened before. I've been a member for, whooo, 9 years or so. I guess it was just bound to happen. I intend to put in a complaint to the post office mail fraud division (since I mailed payment) and the FTC (general fraud). Will I get my $38 back? Nah, probably not. I could get all mad and huffy and puffy but, hell, getting robbed from someone I don't know is a hell of a lot better than getting robbed from someone I did know.

F. I got a sunburn from the Renaissance fair. On my face and on my SCALP. WHAT THE FUCK, YO! Last I checked I'm not losing my hair. I guess since it was tepid weather my guard was lowered. Funny thing: last time I went I got a sunburn, too, but primarily on my neck. I guess long hair traded head protection for neck protection?

G. Melissa is coming next week. I'm going to see her. You can't talk me out of it. I'm going to meet her fiancee. Time to see what replaced me. ;)

That's it for now. PEESE.

Dealbreaker Fantasy

Here I shall describe the seemingly indescribable. The woman I just cannot ever date.

The woman I cannot ever date would think Final Fantasy VIII is better than Final Fantasy VII. The woman I cannot ever date would disagree with me when it came to the assertion that Final Fantasy VI was better than Final Fantasy VII. The woman I cannot ever date would not have played Final Fantasy IX, and if she did, might not agree that it was better than both Final Fantasy VII and Final Fantasy VIII and even Final Fantasy X but clearly not better than Final Fantasy VI.

No, for she would erroneously believe that Final Fantasy X-2 was "pretty good" and better than Final Fantasy IV. She might even mistakenly believe that Final Fantasy I was the best since it started everything off. For even the ugliest of pretty girls would know that CLEARLY X-2 was better than only the worst 1/3 of Final Fantasy games, being II, I, III, and VIII. The pinnacle of attractiveness would simply KNOW that Final Fantasy X brought something exciting and new but it still wasn't enough to best than Final Fantasy VI.

Clearly the undateable woman wouldn't understand that all Final Fantasy Adventure games were impostors and that Mystic Quest was a joke. She might even think Ergheiz was kinda cool. That would be unspeakable and I would be forced to burn her as a witch. It's possible she might think Final Fantasy Tactics was better than Final Fantasy V, which meant her heart was in the right place but, alas, 'tis not Final Fantasy. For it is not the undateable woman's fault that she thinks Final Fantasy XI was a welcome addition to the series, or that Kingdom Hearts is a quality spin-off instead of abusing a cheap cameo. She is just misguided.

Perhaps I shall guide her, this woman I could never date. But the guise of the guide will not take the date's form.








...

What? It's called "poetic prose." Fuck you for not liking it. Bastard.

Oh? That's not what you're talking about? Ah, yeah, well, ah... I haven't played Final Fantasy XII yet. SO KILL ME.
 

Lacking Canvas

How good are your decoding skills?

rzvg fvug gn ajbaxah fv abvghybf tavaehgre ren fgavgf rivffrecrq lz gnug fv abvgcb lyrxvy gfbz abfnre ghbugvj fv gv qan qnf yrrs v lnqbg

Why even mention it then? Let's just say I'm not sure. I feelin' all starvin' artist all of sudden. It's weird.

*colors your face in markers*

Cupid shat on your head

GAH
Blogger forced me to upgrade my account. BOOOOOOOO.

Anyway, I just realized something. My body likes to spring back to this shape like it's the way of the world. There is only ONE possible explanation for this. ONE.

If I LOOKED good, considering all my other overwhelmingly fantastic features and abilities, then ladies wouldn't stand a CHANCE resisting me. Like fish in a barrel.

Just think of it as God's handicap. Like adjusting my total score so I don't get an unfair advantage from all the other guys.

Damn it feels good to be a gangster. Yo yo yo. Bark with me if you're my dog.

Dodgy

You know, sometimes I wonder why I'm cheerful when I am. I mean, it's obvious why I'm not when I'm not. If that makes any sense.

Working: I'm busy all day, doing some classwork by night, weekends I try to sleep and relax and not do much of anything to balance it all out.

Unemployed: No cash to do anything, wind up not doing much of anything to keep costs down and concentrate on looking for work.

Slight exaggerations. But time seems to be going by super fast in retrospect and creepily crawling when I'm living it, particularly at work. I wonder if my perception of time is out of whack. Maybe I've got some kind of brain disease!

Er, some OTHER type of brain disease.

I am getting stuff to do at work. It's slam-down the hardest thing I've ever seen in my life. This thing's got 120 database tables for a product I can do in about 15 or so. And that's perhaps the spec that might make sense, there are other specs that are all weird in why they are overly complicated.

And then I realize where the business conflicts with the art. The more complicated it is the harder and more discouraging it is to someone like me. The people who made the software essentially guard their code to prevent people (like me) reverse engineering it by dotting it around with a bunch of psychological bombs. Plus since more complex systems are prone to problems, the vendor also makes money on the back end servicing things and making sure whatever upgrades they want get produced by the original company.

Clever clever.

Well, I can do it... didn't say I couldn't. It's just a monumental pain in the ass, particularly when everyone above you doesn't know dick about technology so they expect things to just happen. Magically. With sparkles.

Oh well. At least I've got something to do while at work.

Anyway, tonight I'm getting stinking drunk. Dirty stinking drunk. I'd invite you all, but, pfft, nah.

Yup yup

  
(lulz)
  

Moving Right Along...

Now that THAT ugliness is behind us, here are some thoughts on Thief III.

Thief III Deadly Shadows is pretty good. It's definitely not the best in the series, but I'm having trouble figuring out whether Thief I or Thief II was my favorite. It's realistic running around the same city day after day to fence your goods and buy equipment, but it's a micromanagement that I rather not deal with, personally. It's not fun to sneak all the way to the opposite side of The City to sell off art goods and then sneak another way back to sell gems, for example. You don't have to be insanely diligent: cityfolk don't know or care that you're around but City Watch and any opposing factions don't take kindly to you.

Plus, I'm not sure how I feel about that faction stuff. I mean, after the first game you're supposedly in good with the Hammers but then Karras takes helm and you're the enemy again but then you stop him and the Hammers like you again and then you have to steal from the Hammers again. Love hate love hate. You can also ally with the Pagans but that makes no sense: you totally iced the Woodsy Lord. Sure, it's neat to ally yourself with a faction and run up to them in good light and practically pat them on the ass without so much as a peep but... so?

Now, Thief takes patience to play. At least for me. I like to sneak around everywhere, plucking all I can off shelves and whatnot. I don't wanna kill anyone, but I have no qualms against knocking everyone out and piling them up in a corner. (I secretly imagine people coming to and wondering why someone's fishing for trout between their legs.) Anyway, doing a level takes a few hours or so. You know, to figure out good paths, check out patrol routes, etc etc. And after 30 minutes or so I just get tired of being on edge. So save, come back later, and it's all good. Which is another issue with the whole City intermission levels... just put me where I need to be... I don't want to spend another hour or so doing the whole City level again, since I don't know if the next mission is going to advance the day. When the day advances, a lot of goods come back to get stolen again.

Well, I was tired of playing and I found a mission and I figured, while it's up, let's case the joint. So I'm running around like a jerk and getting spotted and chased and fought with and I'm TAKING PEOPLE OUT. Fancy dagger play, sniped with arrows, gassed out of existence, exploding mines, a fucking FLAMING FIRE ARROW OF DEATH TO THE FACE. I wasn't killed. I was hurt, but it wasn't too bad with all the health potions around. The game shouldn't have let me do that. They should have ganged up on me and beat me into submission. It's supposed to be that way... the ONLY way to play the levels should be stealthy sneaky thief. Now, things could go horribly wrong and you can defend yourself and mitigate the situation. But, come on, I did the WHOLE level Metal Gear Solid style. Boooooooooooooooo

I'm not sure how far I am in the storyline since I can't use an FAQ for that game without it being ruined totally. But it sure LOOKS pretty. I miss the rope arrow and instead got these "Human Fly" gloves that let me climb walls. When I bought the upgrade I was trippin' with how awesome it would be, except I've found ZERO instances in which it's useful. All walls have an overhang or a balcony above it that prevents you doing kickass stuff like squirreling around on rooftops like you did in Thief II (which were really fun missions).

If you have a computer strong enough to play it, I suggest checking it out.

I also saw some Chobits this weekend. But it's already kinda late. I have a feeling that series is going to make me cry a little.

SPOIL IT FOR ME AND DIE IN A FIRE.
 

Go Away

So, ok, I know you're reading this. I don't know nor need to know WHY you are. I haven't so much as breathed a word to you in forever (even though it's not long enough) and if I never hear from you again it'll be too soon.

This is a drug free zone, a no bitches zone, and, basically, a NO U zone. So GIT. It's funny how notably and quickly my life improves when you're not in it. You really have held me back all that time.

So go away. I don't want you to think you're clever or anything about how you're spying on me like "tee-hee, he's got no clue." I do have a clue. I've always been smarter than you, you know. So much for leaving Gifted because you were tired of people being snobs... seems to me like you got axed 'cause you weren't makin' the cut.

If you're having trouble figuring out where you should go in this blog's stead, try http://www.portalofevil.com/ . You should be happy there. ^^

For the rest of you, check this out. I was wondering why Tomoyo's Room stopped updating, and here's why. Gotta love it!